


Memory Overwrite

by Mishka_kitty



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, noncon flashback, possible trigger
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-01
Updated: 2015-04-01
Packaged: 2018-03-20 17:16:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3658623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mishka_kitty/pseuds/Mishka_kitty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An innocent comment from Lizzie gets Ciel thinking on something he'd rather not dwell on. But the thoughts trigger a nightmare and he tasks Sebastian with making him forget the pain.<br/>TRIGGER WARNING: description of rape</p>
            </blockquote>





	Memory Overwrite

**Author's Note:**

> So I'm extremely sick of reading stories written by people who clearly have no concept of how anal sex even works. So, to prove a point that I know no one will care about, I wanted to show a contrastbetween the push-in-with-no-prior-preparation-or-lubrication method and the way it should be handled. And this is what came out of my head because yeah.. Ciel's nightmare is a flashback to the month of torture and is quite painful to read as pointed out by my friend who betaed this. Sorry but it had to be done.  
> Disclaimer: not my characters, sigh.  
> Thanks to [Harlequinade13](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Harlequinade13/pseuds/Harlequinade13) for the beta.

It was such an innocuous comment; the type of thing anyone might say. After all, such things were all but required by this society so why shouldn't Elizabeth have certain expectations. But, despite his best efforts to put the matter out of his mind for now, those offhanded words still rang in Ciel's head even as Sebastian closed the door behind himself, leaving Ciel's bedroom in darkness.

He couldn't even really remember now how the subject was brought up or how such a comment would have been relevant. It hardly mattered. Whatever conversation he and his betrothed had been holding over tea that afternoon, it was undoubtedly pointless and boring; he never bothered to remember such things. But one line did stand out. Relentlessly.

"Oh Ciel! When we have kids I hope they are as smart as you."

Ciel growled quietly in frustration and rolled over to stare through the half open window into a pitch black night. New moon and too overcast to see the stars. Quite apt, he thought.

And why shouldn't Lizzie expect to have his children one day. They were to be married and that marriage was expected to produce offspring. He had never hated this prearranged marriage more than he did right now. He'd tried telling himself it hardly mattered as he wasn't even planning to live that long. But what if he did. There was a chance after all, how ever small. How on Earth was he supposed to play the perfect husband if he could barely handle Lizzie's innocent touches now.

Another frustrated huff. He'd never get to sleep if he kept dwelling on ridiculous things like this. And he couldn't afford to be tired tomorrow; it was always best to be at the very top of your game during business meetings, especially when you were already at a disadvantage. But despite all his efforts, Ciel lay wide awake, mind spinning for hours that night. It wasn't until the ditch of the morning, the darkest hour just before the dawn, that his exhaustion finally caught up with him and he slipped into a fitful sleep. But in the end, he would have been better off staying awake. As all his fretting over closeness and his aversion to it sent him directly into a vivid reminder of just why he was broken.

* * *

Pain. He has been reduced to nothing but pain. The pain of a stomach clinching on itself having had nothing resembling food in days. The pain of a parched and aching throat. The pain of un-cushioned, protruding bones against a cold stone floor and unforgiving steal bars. The agony of the cold, the relentless, debilitating cold, biting into his bones and turning his skin red and raw. It is the middle of December and if they do not get food why should they get blankets? The pain of the blows these people dole out to their child captives like candy, rewards for any reason at all. And now this.

The men, three of them, come to his cage. He can hear their raucous laughter from all the way down the long, long corridor of caged and dying children. He can smell the alcohol too; they reek of it. He watches them with apathetic eyes as they stop in front of him. He won't give them the satisfaction of begging not to be hurt like so many of the children do when attention is turned their way. But he desperately hopes this will be short. Perhaps they only mean to mock him, not touch. A very faint hope but it's all he has now.

But no. That tiny prayer is not answered as one man pulls a key ring from his pocket and unlocks his cage. No one has heard him so far, why start listening now.

Large, rough hands reach in and seize his hair in a cruel grip. He is dragged from his prison, his only protection, and tossed carelessly over someone's shoulder. He doesn't listen to what they are saying; he sees no reason to pay attention. He thinks he knows what will happen. They like to play with the children when they're drunk, beating them for sport. But very soon he wishes he'd known. He wishes he could have had any warning at all.

He finds himself thrown down on a hard table top and looks up to see the three looming over him with twisted, evil smiles. The table is no better than his stone floor but his entire body is now aching as it warms due to the fire burning in this room. He clenches his teeth to hold back a whimper.

"Sush a pretty little thing," one slurs, reaching down to pinch his cheek. He forces himself not to react.

"Yeah very pretty but he's no fun. Why'd ya choose that'on?"

"Think 'bout it," the first says with sickening eagerness. "I's always most fun to break the strong ones and make 'em scream."

He glares up at them. He will not scream for them. He will not. He thinks they have done all they can to him and he has taken it in determined silence. He can do it again.

The second man's eyes light up with evil glee and he cackles. The third spats at his feet.

"Jus' get on with it. I've been waitin' long'nough."

And it seems they are done speaking as they turn back to him.... And begin tearing the rags that serve him  
as clothing away from his frail body. He gasps in surprise and stares at them, suddenly very afraid. They have never stripped him like this before. What if he was wrong? What if there is something more  
they can do to him?

And as the last scrap of material is torn from him, he sees one of the men unfastening his pants. He cannot miss the obvious erection. He is old enough to know what that is. And what they intend to do with it. No! Oh no no no no no no no! Now he begins to struggle.

"Now now.  
There's no need for all that," one man tisks. "Just lie back and take it little doll."

"Like a man. You think you're so strong so prove it."

"For England."

Apparently, this is very amusing because all three roar with drunken glee. But he doesn't notice.  
All he notices are the hands holding him down and the position that uncovered man is taking between his forcefully spread thighs.

"You can't!" he cries in desperation. It's the first  
time in days that they have gotten a sound from him and his voice is hoarse from dryness and disuse. It is barely recognizable as his own.

"You can't!!"

He looks down at the thing this man intends to put ... to put ... oh god, there's no way his tiny body can take this.

"You can't!!!"

Laughter and a cruel slap to his face are his only rewards for his efforts. The force of the blow rocks his head to the side and stuns him briefly. And before he can regain his senses enough to fight, he feels hard fingers gripping his buttocks with merciless force. Those hands pull, prying him open and he pants in fear, trying desperately to pull free. But he is outmatched and overpowered with terrifying and painful ease.

"So soft," the man grunts. "I bet he's tight as a vise."

His stomach roils and heaves even though there's nothing in it to eject. No, no, no!

"Get on with it man.  
I want my turn with that ass."

The man between his thighs grunts in response and lines himself up. The grip on his hips tightens even more; he knows these bruises will not fade for weeks. And the next second something huge and hard is being forced into him and the pain! The pain is excruciating! Much, much more than he has ever felt before, so much more than he could have imagined! He cannot possibly hold back his screams as that flesh is forced deeper and he can feel his muscles tear. He writhes and cries but the man takes his pleasure with ferocious indifference. Maybe his tears are arousing them further but he simply cannot stop. All the dignity and all the determination which had kept him alive all this time is stripped from him with one quick thrust of this man's hips and Ciel Phantomhive screams. He screams as he feels his own blood flowing down his thighs. He screams as the man thrusts harder into his abused body. He screams as his rapist finally releases inside him and the salty fluid sears his torn flesh. And as the man pulls free and another takes his place, he screams because he knows this will not be over for a very, very long time. He screams even when his voice has given out and no sound will come from his damaged throat. He tastes blood as the agony turns his world red and then to deepest black.

* * *

"Young master, wake up!"

Shrill screams of pure anguish rang through the large room, the thrashing boy tangled in the bedclothes seemingly oblivious to the reality around him.

"Young master. You are dreaming. Open your eyes."

But as the butler reached out to try to still the boy's flailing, Ciel only shrieked again and pulled away, curling into a trembling ball on the far side of the bed.

"Don't touch me!"

So he was awake. And lost to the past again. Sebastian hadn't seen an episode this severe since the early days of their contract. Not that Ciel's nightmares had ever really left him but he was usually able to brush them off and come back to the present. Occasionally, they would be especially vivid and Sebastian would be obliged to bring him a warm drink to calm his nerves and sit with him until he felt able to face the darkness alone again. Not that Ciel ever admitted aloud that this was the reason behind his order to stay. But the demon always knew. Just as he had known this attack was coming when he sensed Ciel's restlessness and anxiety. Well, admittedly he'd not expected it to be quite this bad. He hadn't needed the pull of the contract to summon him to the boy's side; those screams were more than sufficient. It was a wonder, he thought, that the other servants weren't running to see what the matter was. So his hearing was considerably more acute than a human's but Ciel's cries had echoed down the hallway and the stairs even through the thick walls.

"My lord, please. I will not hurt you. Open your eyes and look at me. I cannot lie to you."

Ciel whimpered but only curled tighter into himself, tensed as though expecting a blow. Sebastian sighed. Demons were not made to comfort terrified humans, quite the opposite. But there was something sweet in the ironic trust Ciel placed in him and him alone. And really, if it gave him an excuse to be closer to his little master....

Sebastian carefully lowered himself to sit on the edge of the large bed, watching Ciel closely. The small body was trembling so much he could hear the clicking of chattering teeth. Now, how had he done this three years ago? Ah yes. The direct approach. Truthfully, he hadn't the patience for anything else.

The demon turned and reached for his master again, this time not withdrawing when Ciel flinched and whined in fear. Strong arms gathered the shaking body up and drew it to a warm chest, ignoring the boy's struggles.

"Hush now. If you will only open your eyes you will see there is nothing here to harm you."

Ciel whined again. "Please."

Such a tiny and broken plea from such an indomitable soul as this made even Sebastian's demonic heart ache a little. And humans maligned demons as most vile. Ah the irony.

"You don't have to plead with me, young master," Sebastian murmured. He forcefully pushed down his natural tendency to enjoy his prey's begging.

"It hurts," Ciel whimpered, shivering. But his tiny fingers found their way to Sebastian's collar and clung tightly. "I'm so tired and it hurts."

"I know, young one."

There was no mockery in that gentle tone, only tenderness. And maybe it wasn't all fake.

"Please, please don't let them touch me. I've bled too much."

"They are dead. I have already killed all of them. Do you remember?"

Finally, one eye peeked up at him from beneath those long lashes. The violet symbol of their bond glowed softly.

"I would like to kill them again," came the small voice. But Sebastian could hear his Ciel returning at last.

He nodded. "As would I," he said, honestly.

Ciel clung to him, tiny body curled into his chest as though trying to bury itself in the only safe place it knew.

"I can't go on like this," Ciel whispered, face pressed into the hollow of Sebastian's shoulder.

Sebastian made no reply, having no answer to this. He wondered how long Ciel would cling to him this time. As the silence stretched and those small hands only gripped tighter, he made a mental note to reschedule all of today's appointments.

"If I may ask, young master, what provoked this? You have not had such an episode in years," Sebastian inquired softly.

Ciel didn't bother to lift his head from his demon's shoulder as he answered, "Lizzie."

"Lady Elizabeth? Forgive me, my lord, but I don't follow."

"She wants children."

Sebastian stared down at the top of Ciel's head, still lost.

"Yes? That seems a natural thing for her to desire."

Ciel sighed in frustration. "I know it's a moot point. I know this, you don't have to remind me. But still ... if I can't bare to even hold her hand without flinching ... I refuse to be this weak." Fear was giving way to self-disgust and anger now.

Sebastian rested one large hand against the slender back, feeling the fragile bones rise and fall beneath the thin flesh with each shallow breath. The heat of Sebastian's skin soaked through the thin material of Ciel's nightshirt to warm his freezing skin. Ciel shivered slightly and cuddled deeper into his demon's embrace. Sebastian stayed silent, waiting. He could sense the direction in which his master's thoughts were going. He thought he could guess what the order would be. He wanted his suspicions to be correct. Even though it would mean having to be gentle and coddling, he still wanted it very much.

"Sebastian."

Ciel finally lifted his head to look his demon in the eyes.

"Help me."

Sebastian studied Ciel's face calmly, betraying nothing of his thoughts.

"How shall I help you, young master?"

Ciel took a deep breath, clearly steeling himself.

"I need you to touch me. I need to relearn how not to flinch."

Sebastian's expression remained stoic, not revealing a hint of the evil smile within. When it came to Ciel, he was always right.

"I'm not certain I understand you, my lord," he said slowly. "You want me to ... touch you?"

Ciel looked exasperated but Sebastian wanted this order to be as precise as possible so there would be no misunderstanding or getting out of it.

"Yes, I want you to touch me. I want you to ... teach me. I know such things are supposed to be pleasurable but I cannot ... I don't know how else to do this but to face it directly." Ciel's voice was firm, no doubt in his eyes. But he was trembling again.

Sebastian smiled finally, holding Ciel's gaze.

"As you wish, my lord."

"Don't hurt me." The words left Ciel's lips in a quick rush of hot breath as though he couldn't hold them back.

Sebastian nodded. "No, young master. This is not meant to hurt. At least, not that you will care about."

Ciel glared at him. "What does that mean," he demanded roughly.

"It means," the demon said patiently, "that I cannot prevent all pain simply because of practicalities. But I know what I'm doing and it will not be much and not more than you can stand. In any case, the pleasure will outweigh any discomfort."

"Of course you know what you're doing," Ciel muttered, choosing not to comment on the explanation to his inquiry.

Sebastian chuckled lightly. "Quite. Now, if you'll give me a moment, my lord?"

Ciel frowned at him, clearly not wanting to let go, as Sebastian gently pried the small fingers from his collar and lay his master back down.

"Where are you going?"

"I must send out messages rescheduling your appointments for the day. I do not think it wise to attempt to meet with anyone when you are not at your best."

Ciel scoffed, offended out of habit. But he didn't object; Sebastian was right and it was an enormous relief not to have to worry about his work just now.

"Hurry," he said with a sigh. "Please."

Sebastian hesitated as he was standing from the bed, startled by that last word. He turned back to carefully lay a hand lightly against Ciel's cheek.

"Yes, young master. I will not be long."

* * *

Ciel stared at the ceiling, counting the seconds as they dragged by. Sebastian was incredibly fast but he supposed even the demon needed a bit more time to actually write legibly. So he waited, so tense he ached. He was afraid of what he'd asked for, afraid because his body told him it already knew what to expect. But right now he just wanted Sebastian to come back, even if it did hurt. Right now he absolutely did not want to be alone in this dark room.

He'd counted off about three and a half minutes when the door softly opened and the tall figure slipped inside.

"Forgive me for taking so long, my lord," came the quiet voice as the door clicked shut. Ciel just nodded.

Apparently satisfied with this response, the demon quickly crossed the room to draw the curtains over the large windows, blocking the light that was just beginning to peek through the morning mist. Ciel absently mused that this was an ironic change of routine. But his mind was too preoccupied with apprehension to really dwell on ironies at the moment. As the demon approached the bed again, Ciel pushed himself up to sit against the headboard, his eyes fixing curiously on the small jar Sebastian carried in one hand. When Sebastian hesitated slightly at the bedside, he held out a hand. He would not back out of this now.

"What is that?" he asked, indicating the jar as Sebastian sat on the bed beside him.

Ciel noted the demon had removed his shoes already, though he still wore his black socks.

"Essential oil," Sebastian answered simply, placing the jar on the nightstand.

"What for?" Ciel frowned, genuinely puzzled.

Sebastian paused in the act of stripping down to his shirt sleeves and gave Ciel a look that was shockingly close to compassion. It made him feel distinctly strange.

"The oil makes everything easier and relatively painless," Sebastian explained, adding, "and it is generally pleasant."

Ciel nodded thoughtfully. He supposed that made since, all things considered. He watched with interest as the demon slipped his tailcoat and vest from his shoulders and tossed them easily across the room to land perfectly over a chair. Showoff.

"Now," Sebastian held his arms out. "Come here, young master."

Ciel hesitated only a second before crawling into his demon's lap and letting those strong, familiar arms wrap around him securely. Sebastian drew him tightly against his chest and settled him comfortably.

"Firstly, master," Sebastian began, speaking softly into Ciel's hair, "I must make something clear. You must tell me to stop if I am hurting you. Not that I don't expect you to do so, only that it is not my natural tendency to be very gentle in bed."

Ciel turned his head to look up into those glowing red eyes. Those eyes were definitely not human now; he could see the hunger there. But it was restrained and tempered with something more tender to which Ciel could not possibly put a name. The hunger surprised him; it hadn't occurred to him that Sebastian would be happy and willing to do this for his own sake. But then, he was a demon and this was debauchery.

"I didn't really expect that it was," Ciel answered calmly. "But you will not hurt me."

Sebastian smirked slightly. "No, in fact I can't, can I. At least not purposefully. I am warning you against the possibility that I should forget myself and do something accidently."

Ciel studied him curiously. "Why would you lose control? This can't be anything you are not accustomed to. In fact, I have seen you use it as a tactic to gather information from people."

Sebastian shook his head, his smile turning from sardonic to something gentler. Ciel could only call it seductive.

"Young master," Sebastian murmured, one hand sliding up Ciel's back and into his hair. "Countless creatures have been performing this act since the beginning of life itself; that is not the problem. The thing is, you are different than any arbitrary human I may have bedded for the sake of your investigations. That was simply another duty to attend to. But you ... you are mine. And I want you."

With the last words Sebastian's voice dropped to its lowest registers and Ciel shivered not unpleasantly. That voice was like the softest fabric against his skin. Smooth, seductive sin. And he didn't know quite what to do with it.

Sebastian looked down at him with smouldering eyes, fingers carding through his hair gently.

"It is a demon's natural desire to be as close to their master as possible, why do you think I bother to carry you so often. And in any case, you are ... exquisite."

Ciel frowned at him, disbelieving, and Sebastian smirked. "Why do you think people keep trying to sell you."

This comment earned the demon an icy glare and a light slap. Sebastian just chuckled quietly and cuddled Ciel closer. Ciel huffed in apparent annoyance but he rested his cheek against Sebastian's shoulder and snuggled into the warmth.

"All right, you have warned me," he said. "I understand."

"Good," Sebastian said quietly. "Then..."

One large, warm hand came up to cup the side of Ciel's face, urging him to tilt his head back. And the next thing he knew, his lips were covered by Sebastian's in a slow, tender kiss. Ciel gasped in surprise at the novel pleasure of feeling those warm and oh-so-soft lips moving gently against his own. Sebastian was kissing him. His demon was kissing him and it was so ... very good. He'd never before been able to understand what was meant to be so pleasurable about this act but now, as he tentatively began to mimic his demon's actions and kiss him back, he couldn't imagine why he'd never wanted to do this before.

Sebastian's hand slid down, fingers brushing the side of his neck before moving to cradle the back of his head and press him closer. His other hand rubbed Ciel's back in slow, soothing circles, as he held him possessively against his chest. Ciel, gaining confidence in the kiss, pressed his lips harder to Sebastian's and reached to tangle his fingers in that silken hair. He was immediately fascinated by the softness, running his small hands through it, loving the slide of silky strands along his skin.

A low purring sound came from Sebastian's throat at the gentle stroking and his tongue came out to lightly trace Ciel's bottom lip. Ciel parted his lips slightly to gasp quietly and Sebastian took it as an invitation to slip his tongue into the warm, wet cavern. And Ciel was caught completely by surprise at how pleasurable the sensation was. The slick slide, the teasing flutter against his own tongue. He responded curiously, following Sebastian's lead.

By the time Sebastian broke the kiss, Ciel was panting and flushed. The fingers of one hand were still tangled in Sebastian's hair while the other had slipped down to rest against the back of the demon's neck. Sebastian's hands still held him possessively close, fingers rubbing little circles wherever they touched.

"Why did you stop?" Ciel demanded, still managing to sound annoyed even when breathless.

Sebastian smirked at him. "Well, I rather thought you may want to breathe before you pass out," he said conversationally.

Ciel didn't bother to respond to this. He couldn't deny he'd thoroughly enjoyed the kiss; it had quite effectively distracted him from his fear. He suspected this was Sebastian's reason for his actions. He doubted that demon's were usually so gentle in their relations as to spend time on kissing. Which begged the question of what he was to expect from this encounter. He knew what he'd asked for and he knew Sebastian would be gentle but there was that warning....

He leaned into his demon's chest and buried his face against the side of Sebastian's neck. Quite without thinking, he pressed a tiny kiss to that smooth, cool skin. So soft. He wondered if he imagined the tiny shiver that rippled through Sebastian's body.

"Sebastian, what do you intend to do?" As Ciel spoke, his lips moved against Sebastian's skin.

"Well master," Sebastian murmured. "You said you wished to face what frightens you the most. So I intend to show you what they did wrong in their cruelty. And, because I know you are wondering, I am well aware of your limits and my own strength."

Ciel didn't have to see Sebastian's face to know he was smirking as he said the last. He didn't answer but pressed himself closer to Sebastian. He would not admit to his fear but he knew the demon sensed it all the same. Those large, capable hands rubbed his back gently.

"Do you wish to rescind your order, master?"

The question was spoken softly, with no hint of mockery or judgement. Ciel shook his head.

"No, Sebastian. I will finish what I began."

"Very well."

And Sebastian moved, gently disengaging Ciel's arms from around himself and laying his small form out amongst the pillows. Ciel looked up to watch Sebastian as the demon leaned over him, eyes burning. Slender fingers began undoing the buttons of Ciel's nightshirt with quick efficiency and Ciel suddenly felt self-conscious. Of course, Sebastian had seen him unclothed countless times by now but somehow this was different. That passionate stare the demon had fixed on him made him want to squirm and hide himself. But he had no time as the shirt was opened fully, exposing his bare torso to the air and those ravenous eyes.

"Exquisite," Sebastian whispered, seemingly to himself.

That word again.

One elegant finger traced a line down the center of Ciel's body from the hollow of his throat to his navel. He shivered and almost unconsciously tried to curl into himself to hide.

"No, my lord, please. Let me see you."

The longing in that voice alone was enough to make Ciel relax and lay still. It was shockingly genuine.

Sebastian carefully slid the shirt from his shoulders and pulled it from beneath him. Ciel didn't see where it ended up as his eyes were fixed on the figure leaning over him, casting a shadow to cover him in warm darkness. And he couldn't care less as those hands were on him again. So gentle and warm even through the gloves. But...

"Sebastian, take off the gloves," he said, the command coming out more breathy than he'd intended.

Sebastian smiled and obliged, lifting first his left then his right hand to his mouth, gripping the middle finger between his teeth and tugging the gloves free. They fell into the same unknown as Ciel's discarded nightshirt. And those hands were touching him again, this time bare skin against skin, stroking up and down his sides.

"Better, my young master?"

"Yes," Ciel breathed, lost to the sensation of touch.

The feeling was indescribably good. After years of flinching from even the touch of his family even this simple gesture felt momentous. The last people to lay their hands on his body had done all in their power to break him. They had failed in the end.

Ciel reached up and lightly brushed his fingers across Sebastian's sculpted cheekbone. The demon caught his gaze and smiled slightly, one eyebrow arched. Ciel answered the unspoken question by sliding his hand around the back of his demon's neck and tugging his hair. A soft sound left Sebastian's throat and he followed his master's hands, leaning down, supporting himself with one hand while the other traced meaningless patterns on Ciel's stomach. The muscles jumped beneath the teasing fingertips and Ciel briefly marveled at just how sensitive that flesh was. He tilted his face up, lips parted, and Sebastian took the hint. He moved to cover Ciel's body completely with his own as their lips met again, tongues dancing. But this time when Ciel became too breathless to continue, Sebastian's lips merely slid to the corner of his mouth and down. Those soft lips traced a line of tiny, butterfly kisses down Ciel's jaw to the hollow below his ear. There they paused and Ciel gasped as he felt the flick of a warm, wet tongue against his earlobe. When exactly had his skin become so sensitive?

Sebastian laughed softly against his neck, making him shiver. That wicked tongue flicked out again and curled around the stone in his ear, drawing the lobe into that sweet suction. Ciel whimpered softly and immediately clapped a hand over his mouth in mortification. But Sebastian's cool fingers wrapped around his wrist and gently pulled his hand away.

"Don't, my young lord. There is no shame here."

Ciel frowned at these words. He was rather ashamed of this entire situation. But even so ... that warm tongue tracing the outer edge of his ear and the hand that had traveled up his chest to circle ever-so-light fingertips around one nipple. Ciel whimpered again, this time unable to muffle the sound with his demon's fingers holding his wrist gently but firmly.

"Yes," Sebastian hissed softly against the side of Ciel's neck as his mouth traveled downward, sucking gently at the soft flesh.

A thrill danced along Ciel's nerves at the sheer lust in that decadent voice and he didn't even try to hold back the quiet moan this time. Perhaps that fire should have scared him, it was lust that had scarred him the most, but those hands were only gentle and that mouth felt incredible and he found himself only wanting to touch and be touched. And then Sebastian's fingers flicked across the tiny pink nub and Ciel's entire body jerked.

"Ah! Sebastian!" He gasped out the name in as much surprise as pleasure.

"Mmmmm, so very sensitive," Sebastian purred in his ear.

"Sh-shut up," Ciel gasped as those wicked fingers caught the tiny bud and squeezed lightly, rolling it between them. Why on Earth did that feel so damn good?!

Sebastian chuckled lightly and drew back to look down into Ciel's eyes. "It was not an insult, my lord. Quite the opposite."

Ciel frowned at him, distracted from the physical pleasure by his suspicious curiosity. "Why?"

"I'm sorry?"

"Why are you not insulting me," Ciel clarified a little more sharply than he'd intended.

One elegant, dark eyebrow rose in surprise. "Why should I wish to insult you now?" Sebastian asked curiously.

Ciel huffed in annoyance. "Because you always do; it's one of your favorite games, I know it."

"Well, as it is yours to find any way possible to irritate or inconvenience me," Sebastian replied, smirking. "But," he continued, expression turning surprisingly serious, "such a game would be very counterproductive just now. It is certainly not the way to get what I want."

Ciel swallowed and licked his suddenly dry lips. When he spoke, his voice came out quiet and raspy and he barely recognized it. "And ... what do you want?"

A truly wicked smile spread across his demon's face and Ciel wondered for a moment if he'd gotten himself into something he was going to dearly regret. Sebastian leaned back down until his lips just barely brushed Ciel's ear, warm breath tickling the small hairs there. The voice which spoke directly into his ear was smooth seduction, pure sin.

"Young master. What do I want? I want to see you come undone and lose yourself in bliss. I want to touch you, to play your nerves like the strings of a violin to see what lovely sounds I can bring forth. I want to erase any memory of another's hands on you and leave my mark. I want to feel you writhe beneath me and cry out for more. I want to taste every inch of you and drink you down. I want to make you scream my name." Then he pulled back to see Ciel's stunned expression and chuckled, a low, sensual sound that made Ciel shudder beneath him. "And if you don't like the answers you are given, you should not ask such questions."

Ciel stared at him, at a complete loss for words. Somewhere in the back of his mind, his rational self was telling him how terrified he should be right now. But the rest of him was not listening as every word Sebastian spoke raised the heat of his blood another degree until he felt on fire. It was different, so different, from before. Then they had used and abused him for their own cruel means. Now this ancient and powerful being was looking at him and him alone with such desire it made him weak. And in the end, Ciel knew if he ordered Sebastian to stop, he would. He had too. But the hands that had come up to cradle his face as those crimson eyes watched him deliberate, told him he wouldn't need to give that order.

"Young master?"

Ciel's eyes focused again on his demon's.

"Will you let me have what I want? Don't hide from me."

Ciel lifted one hand to cover Sebastian's where it cupped his own cheek. He fancied he could feel the lines of the contract mark burning beneath his palm. He could see the glow from his own eye.

"I did not say I disliked your answer," he began slowly. "I simply didn't expect it to be so ... fervent. So, yes, Sebastian," he answered, his voice as self-assured as ever. "On one condition."

Sebastian arched an eyebrow. "And what condition is that, my lord?"

Ciel smirked up at him and reached up to tug loose the top button of his shirt. "Take all of this off. I'm at a rather unfair disadvantage here."

Sebastian returned his smirk and took his hand back to place it over his chest. "Of course, my young lord."

The demon climbed gracefully from the bed, leaving Ciel to miss the warmth and pleasure of his hands, and stood facing Ciel, looking down at him with glittering eyes. Ciel watched, enraptured, as those slender fingers began slowly undoing one button after another. When the shirt finally fell open to reveal the bare chest beneath, Ciel's mouth went dry. Truly, Sebastian's form was perfection. Hard, defined muscles under perfectly smooth, pale skin. THE form of a grecian marble statue, Ciel thought as he ran his eyes over the slender strength of that sculpted torso. He found himself fascinated by the large, dark nipples, wondering what they would feel like beneath his fingers, between his lips. But he was thoroughly distracted from this train of thought as Sebastian let the shirt slip from his shoulders to the floor and began work on his trousers. Ciel could already see a impressive bulge beneath the confining cloth and he found himself suddenly apprehensive. Just how big was Sebastian? Apparently something of his thoughts must have shown in his expression because when he glanced up to Sebastian's face, the demon was smirking in that way that made Ciel want to slap him. But he stayed still and watched as Sebastian slipped his thumbs beneath his waistband and drew the clothing down his hips. And a second later he stepped out of them, toeing off the socks at the same time, and kicked them aside to join the clothes already piled on the floor.

"Well, master?" Sebastian said softly, burning gaze fixed on Ciel's face, watching his reaction closely.

Ciel swallowed as his eyes scanned the naked perfection before him. His gaze slid down the sculpted torso again to the narrow hips and long, strong legs. And that perfect erection standing hard and ready between the demon's thighs. A deep, rose color and perfectly proportioned, the sight made Ciel swallow hard. His apprehension stabbed at him again at the thought of what was to come. He knew that pain. But this was Sebastian.

So when his demon took a step towards the bed, Ciel forced himself out of his trance. He lifted a hand towards his demon, hardening his resolve again.

"Come here. I want to touch you."

Sebastian smiled and moved almost too fast for Ciel to follow. The young earl blinked and his demon was straddling him, looking down at him hungrily.

"So touch me, master. I am here for your pleasure."

Those words sent a thrill of possessiveness and desire through Ciel despite his reticence. If Sebastian owned him and wished to mark him then he would claim his ownership as well. So he pushed himself up and reached out to run his hands over that smooth chest. The contrast of silken skin over hard muscles fascinated him. And as Sebastian closed his eyes and submitted to his master's curious hands, Ciel felt his lingering apprehension slip away. This was entirely new.

He ran his fingers up Sebastian's long throat and traced the strong jaw. As his fingertips brushed lightly over those plush lips, Sebastian's tongue flicked out to teasingly tickle his fingers. Ciel's own lips parted on a slight gasp and he drew his hand back down Sebastian's neck to trace the lines of the defined pectorals and lower to the strong abdominals.

Sebastian sighed softly, shifting slightly above him. "Young master," he murmured, voice surprisingly husky. "Your hands feel very nice, but ... would you indulge me?"

Ciel looked up at him curiously. "How do you mean?" he inquired, hands stilling in their exploration.

Sebastian smiled, still not opening his eyes, and took Ciel's hand in his, guiding it back to his chest, placing the small fingertips against his right nipple. A low hiss escaped from between Sebastian's teeth at the contact and Ciel's eyes lit with understanding and wicked intent. His demon offered him a satisfied smile.

Ciel's fingers caught hold of the nipple and he squeezed slightly, gaging Sebastian's reaction with interest. The demon let out a low hiss and slid his hand up Ciel's arm in a shockingly intimate caress.

"Yes. Harder, my lovely little lord. Please."

Ciel's breath caught in his chest at the sound of that voice. The sight of Sebastian's face as the demon stared down at him, crimson gaze riveted on his face. The mask of humanity Sebastian so carefully maintained at all times was slipping. Those eyes burned with the fires of hell, pupils slitted, and a hint of fang could be seen between the parted lips. And his voice had lowered and rumbled with an underlying growl. Ciel remembered that voice from that very first meeting. And any other human would have flinched away in fear. But Ciel was not just any human. This demon was his pawn, his knight, his protector and his damnation, and the only creature who knew him more intimately than he knew himself. So the boy who flinched from the touch of his innocent human fiancee smiled up at the devil hovering over him and found the sight beautiful.

He obliged Sebastian's request and squeezed the nub between his fingers harder, bringing his other hand up to grip the other. His demon sighed and slipped his hand around the back of Ciel's neck to massage the muscles there. A soft sound left Ciel's throat and he pushed himself up, needing more contact. Sebastian chuckled softly and leaned to meet him, pressing their lips together again. Ciel whined quietly into the kiss, still rolling those hard nubs between his fingertips. One large hand rested against his hip, just holding him steady, as that hot tongue challenged his own.

A moment later Sebastian pulled back and looked down into Ciel's eyes.

"There may be a better way to do this than the one I'd originally planned," he said thoughtfully.

Ciel tilted his head, watching him curiously. "And what is that?"

Instead of answering, the demon gripped Ciel's waist and, in one sudden movement, flipped them over so that he lay on his back with Ciel straddling his stomach. Ciel gasped in surprise and stared in him.

"What are you doing?" he demanded, confused.

"You seemed to like to touch," Sebastian answered calmly. "And it seems to me that if the main point of this whole endeavor is to cure you of your fears, then it would be most beneficial to put you in the most dominant position so as to minimize anxiety born of memory. There are other positions which would be technically easier on your body but not, I think, on your mind."

Ciel blinked down at him. He'd honestly not considered it that way. And truthfully, he never imagined that Sebastian would willingly put him in this position. The demon was his servant but he was still a control freak.

Sebastian smirked at the look on Ciel's face.

"We can still do what we both intended to do in this position. But you will have more control over your own movements. And I," he paused and ran his gaze down his Ciel's body with slow, hungry appraisal. "I get to watch you move for me."

Ciel wasn't quite sure to respond to this so he forwent a reply for leaning down to capture that wicked mouth again. He had quickly become addicted to Sebastian's kisses. And Ciel moaned helplessly as this new position pressed his half erect member against his demon's rock hard abs. Sebastian swallowed the sound and chuckled softly against Ciel's lips. Warm, bare hands slid down Ciel's back, fingers lightly tracing along his spine and digging into tense muscles. Ciel shifted on top of Sebastian, his hands braced on the demon's shoulders, and whined again at the feeling of that smooth flesh against his own.

"Delightful," Sebastian purred in his ear. Ciel shivered.

"I don't know what you find so delightful," he managed to huff as those fingers pressed into his lower back and a strange heat seemed to pool in his lower belly.

Sebastian purred again when Ciel's hips jerked slightly against him. "Ah, sensitive there?" he murmured.

And without waiting for an answer, dragged his nails ever so lightly across the small of Ciel's back. A full body shudder shook the small form and another moan escaped. Ciel buried his face against Sebastian's neck and experimentally licked the skin there. Sebastian tasted of cinnamon as though he had spilled the spice on his skin while baking. The demon rewarded him with another agonizingly light drag of his nails across sensitive skin. And then those fingers traveled lower, skimming down over Ciel's hip to the very top of his thigh. That touch was so feather light that Ciel squirmed slightly.

"You're tickling me," he complained against Sebastian's neck.

"My apologies, my young master," came the laughing voice. "Would you prefer I touch you like this?"

And Sebastian curled his hand around the inside of Ciel's thigh and ran it up and down, squeezing gently, kneading the muscles. Ciel gasped and a thought flitted through his hazed mind, 'I want that hand somewhere else.'

Sebastian seemed to sense the thought because he chuckled again, his voice full of mischief. The rumble in his chest vibrated against Ciel's lips, tickling them. He thought of reprimanding the demon for being difficult but only a second later he forgot his annoyance completely as those talented hands gently shifted him so they could reach easily beneath him where he lay mostly prone across Sebastian's chest. And teasing fingertips ghosted down the side of his now fully hardened length. Ciel let out his first cry against Sebastian's shoulder as his hips jerked in surprise and need.

"Aaah yes," Sebastian sighed. "I rather thought this was what you wanted. It really didn't take much."

Ciel growled in warning but he couldn't really muster up the strength to be mad at the words when those fingers were exploring him so thoroughly. Sebastian lazily ran his fingertips over Ciel's flesh, mapping out the new territory with lethal precision. Ciel squirmed and clutched the sheets on either side of Sebastian's shoulders. He had but rarely even touched himself there, like that, and to have another's hand on him was more exquisite than he could have possibly imagined. It was as though every nerve were screaming with the sheer pleasure of being touched. And right now the anxieties that always plagued him when he even thought about this act were far from his mind.

"Young master," Sebastian murmured into Ciel's hair, his voice husky. Ciel shivered at the sound.

"Young master, you're so responsive. Beautiful. Please."

Ciel struggled to bring words forth from his distracted brain. Those fingers had slipped lower between his legs to cup his sack and he was trying to figure out how he'd never thought to touch there before. Oh that was good.

He managed to lift his face to look up into his demon's burning eyes.

"What is it? Tell me, what do you want?, Sebastian?"

Another low purr vibrated in the demon's throat and Ciel shivered. The sound was not quite human and Ciel couldn't help comparing it to the purrs of Sebastian's beloved felines but for all that, he found the sound soothing and erotic all at once. He was usually so wrapped up in trying to torment Sebastian he'd never considered how sweet it would be to be the cause of this incredible being's pleasure. The power was sweet. Even as elegant fingers reduced him to sensation. Pleasure.

Sebastian licked his lips as he dragged his fingers up Ciel's length again.

"I want ... to feel your mouth, your tongue, against my skin, my young lord," he answered with frank lust.

Ciel gasped softly. A stab of alarm went through him as a flash of a memory forced its way into his head. Of impatient drunken voices, a short, curt reply, gleeful laughter, and a rough hand gripping his jaw hard enough to leave deep bruises and forcing his mouth open for the intrusion of something truly vile.

A light hand brushed across his cheek, smoothed back his hair. "Young master, that is not what I meant. I would certainly not turn down the offer were it given but this is not about force."

Ciel blinked, the haze of memory of pain and fear cleared from his eyes. He focused his gaze back on his demon's face. That expression was as gentle as he had ever seen it and just now he didn't care if it was all a lie. He closed his eyes and leaned into Sebastian's hand.

"Then, what did you mean," he whispered softly.

"Only what I said," Sebastian replied gently. "Your lips against my neck. The way you were tasting my skin before I distracted you."

"Oh," Ciel breathed faintly.

He still wasn't quite sure but one large hand held his hip, keeping him steady, the fingers having retracted from his member when he'd frozen in panic. The fingers of the other hand ran soothingly through his hair. So he let the hand cup the back of his skull and guide him back down to the smooth, perfect expanse of the demon's chest.

His lips touched the soft flesh lightly and he hesitantly began placing light kisses along the strong collarbone, his tongue flicking out again to almost shyly play against the skin.

"That's it, little one," Sebastian sighed, warm air stirring Ciel's hair. "Just this."

Ciel relaxed against his demon's strong form again even as a strange, undefinable mix of emotions went through him at that epithet. At any other time he would have slapped Sebastian for saying such a thing. But now ... now it just made him feel oddly cherished and safe. The strength that surrounded him could so easily rip him to shreds, and someday would, but now it acted as his only shelter.

He began to run his lips over Sebastian's skin with more purpose, re-exploring the territory he'd already mapped with his fingertips. Sebastian, sensing Ciel's anxiety had fled again, returned to his earlier task of teasing. Ciel muffled his quiet whimper against Sebastian's sternum.

But as those fingers finally, finally, wrapped around his length fully and began to stroke so torturously slowly, Ciel's eyes fixed on the hard, pebbled nubs he'd been playing with earlier. And he thought he now knew what Sebastian had meant.

He glanced up to see his demon's eyes half lidded and watching him ravenously. A slight smile curved the full lips and the hand between Ciel's legs began to move just slightly faster.

"Hmmmm. Sebastian, too slow." Ciel tried to make his voice commanding but the words came out in a low moaning whine.

Sebastian's eyes flashed. "Mmmm, so eager to end before we've even really begun," the demon teased lightly.

But to Ciel's satisfaction, he did speed up his strokes. And in return, Ciel lowered his head to envelope one dark nipple in his hot, wet mouth and instinctively sucked.

"Aah, oh yes. Yes that's it."

The sound of his normally so stoic demon's voice husky, breathless, and trembling with pleasure made Ciel nearly dizzy with lust. He was causing Sebastian's voice to sound like that. He rocked his hips unconsciously into Sebastian's hand as he flicked his tongue over the tip of the nipple in his mouth and caught the other between his small fingers. And as he shifted atop the larger body, he felt something hard, hot and throbbing press against him. He gasped and stilled for a second. But the fear he'd expected didn't come. Instead, he found himself wanting to see what he was feeling. He rocked his hips again, more deliberately this time, and pressed harder down against Sebastian's arousal.

"Uh," the demon gasped softly and his hips flexed involuntarily.

Ciel's smirk was hidden against Sebastian's chest but he knew the demon could sense it.

He trailed his mouth across the smooth chest, letting his tongue trace the ridges of muscle and leaving behind a wet trail of kisses. But just as he wrapped his lips around the other nipple to attend to it, he heard Sebastian make a soft sound of amusement. He had no time to contemplate what mischief the demon was planning before it was made all too clear.

Sebastian's fingers tightened around him and he began to move his hand in quick, purposeful strokes. Ciel startled as the strong fingers squeezed him almost hard enough to hurt if it didn't feel so damn good. He cried out into Sebastian's chest and, quite inadvertently, bit down on the flesh between his lips.

A low, inhuman growl reverberated through Ciel's body and he went still at once. The sound was feral, the sound of a wild beast, and Ciel didn't know if he should take it as a warning or an encouragement. He peeked up at Sebastian's face through his eyelashes and caught his breath. Eyes narrowed to slits, brow furrowed, fangs bared. The hand on him had stilled, the entire body beneath him had stilled, and Ciel held his breath. Had he made a terrible mistake? He wasn't afraid of Sebastian exactly but in that moment his primal instincts were screaming reminders about the stupidity of bringing a vicious predator into his bed.

Those eyes finally looked down to focus on his face and Ciel let out a sigh as he recognized his faithful demon in that gaze. It was hellish, burning, ravenous and wild, but it was Sebastian. And the voice, when it came, was also familiar, though somewhat strained.

"Careful my little human master. Careful how you touch me. I may enjoy your teeth on my flesh too much."

"Sebastian?" Ciel asked quietly, uncertainly.

The demon took a deep breath and relaxed beneath him. A low, amazed laugh ghosted over Ciel's eardrums.

"You are truly incredible; such a rare soul. I chose well."

Ciel lifted his head to frown at him, his eyes demanding an explanation.

"You are smart enough to know what just happened, I know," Sebastian responded, gaze holding Ciel's, eyes glittering. "You know how close you came to true danger by your unconscious actions. Don't bite. Remember, I warned you I might lose control."

Ciel nodded slightly and buried his face again in Sebastian's neck. "But you didn't," he said firmly, calmly.

Sebastian chuckled again. "Incredible."

He moved then, rolling slightly onto his side, cradling Ciel against himself with one arm. "But you are still in need nevertheless."

And his hand began moving in a blur where it still curled tightly around the young earl's very hard erection.

"Aaah, oh Se-Sebastian that's ... I can't ... I ... please."

Ciel writhed against him at the new, incredible feeling. He could have never pleasured himself this well. He could feel himself already leaking, easing Sebastian's strokes. A thumb swiped across the tip to collect the liquid there and slick it down the shaft, swirled around the head to tease, spread open the tiny slit to let more fluid bubble out. The sudden pleasure wiped Ciel's mind and he clung to his demon and gasped into his shoulder.

"Sebastian, I can't hold," he forced the words out between his cries, some part of him naturally wanting to hold out as long as possible.

But Sebastian only kissed his temple and murmured, "I know. That's the point, little one. Let go. I want it."

Ciel jerked at the last words, growled into his hair, and he broke.

"Sebastian!"

He nearly screamed the demon's name as his body arched and his first truly powerful orgasm crashed over him. Wave after wave of pleasure shook his small frame as he felt his release spurt from him, coating Sebastian's hand and his own stomach in sticky wetness. He trembled as he shattered and fell over that edge and all the while Sebastian held him close, safe. The warm hand very gently stroked him through his pleasure, milking every last drop from him. Ciel shuddered one last time and went limp in his demon's arms, cheek pressed to the broad chest, panting for air and in a daze.

The arm around him tightened as the hand retreated and that low purr rumbled in his ear again, soothing and comforting.

When Ciel finally managed to pry his eyes open a few moments later to look up at his demon, he blinked in surprise. He watched, half disgusted and half fascinated, as that agile tongue thoroughly cleaned the slender fingers. Sebastian caught his gaze and held it as he drew his last finger into his mouth and sucked.

"Hmmmmm. Your taste. Delicious."

Those moaned words, in that quiet, seductive voice, made Ciel shudder again. He wasn't quite sure why Sebastian thought that, but who was he to argue with what a demon liked. Perhaps it was akin to the taste of the soul he had been promised, Ciel thought. Perhaps the demon could taste the hint of his essence in his fluids.

He sighed as gentle fingers ran over his stomach, gathering the mess there and bringing it up to that hot mouth. Ciel lay still as Sebastian cleaned him this way, just enjoying the warmth and lost in afterglow. Finally, Sebastian's hand came to rest on his hip and warm lips pressed a soft kiss to his forehead.

Ciel stirred then, tilting his head back to look up into Sebastian's face.

"Why did you do that?" he asked quietly. "I thought you intended ... something else." His voice held none of its usual sharpness, softened by pleasure as it was.

Sebastian smiled down at him. Ciel noted that he'd not bothered to hide the fangs. He didn't mind.

"Because you needed it, young master," the demon replied simply. "You were too desperate and tense. My intention was to both relax you and ease the intensity. If only a few touches had you so ready, you would not have lasted long anyway. Now you will recover. And the next part will be much easier."

"Hmm," Ciel murmured. He wasn't at all sure about recovery but he didn't argue.

Sebastian chuckled lightly, sensing the uncertainty behind that small sound. He pressed another kiss to Ciel's furrowed brow, smoothing the lines with his lips. Ciel shifted lazily, tilting his face up, lips slightly parted. He wanted another kiss and Sebastian gladly obliged him.

Ciel happily lost himself in the sensation of soft lips and wet heat. The kiss started off sweet but as his demon's hands began running over him again, touching every inch of skin they could reach, Ciel began to feel something stirring in his belly again and pressed his lips harder to Sebastian's. The demon smiled against his mouth and shifted helpfully, welcoming the small hands which began exploring him with eager curiosity.

Ciel was transfixed by the softness beneath his fingers; he never would have thought that such a hard and cold being could be so warm and silky soft. Strands of long raven hair tickled his skin and he reached up to rub a lock between his fingers almost reverently. Sebastian's lips moved from his mouth to suck a hot line down his throat to the soft hollow. Ciel moaned softly and arched his neck to give him better access. He was tired of bothering to hide; this was too good. And why shouldn't he enjoy it? The entire cosmos knew he was due some pleasure.

His hands stilled in Sebastian's hair as the demon's mouth moved lower and Sebastian glanced up at him with wicked eyes.

"Do you wish me to continue?" he asked teasingly.

He'd paused with his lips just above Ciel's left nipple. One hand was lightly, almost absently, stroking up and down Ciel's inner thigh, making him squirm slightly.

Ciel tried to glare. "Idiot," he sighed. "Don't tease me."

Sebastian just laughed. "As you wish, my little one."

And Ciel cried out, back arching to press his chest up to Sebastian's mouth, as those lips wrapped around the tiny pink bud and sucked hard.

"Ah Sebastian. Oh yes please don't stop."

The demon purred against his skin in satisfaction and slipped one large hand beneath Ciel's back to support his spine. Ciel was becoming very fond of that sound that seemed to indicate his demon was enjoying this as much as himself.

But the next second all thoughts were pushed aside as Sebastian began flicking his tongue against the tip of the nipple in his mouth with incredible speed. Ciel writhed, fingers tightening in the silken hair.

"Se-Sebastian! I can't ... please!"

The feeling was intense and so good it was almost painful. The demon hummed indicating he'd understood Ciel's meaning but he only switched to the other nipple and repeated the process. "Bloody hell! Sebastian! Please too much!"

The demon finally drew back and smirked up at him.

"Ah but the sounds you make are so sweet," he sighed.

Ciel huffed. "You're impossible."

"Of course, my young lord," Sebastian only laughed.

But Ciel had become distracted again. Now that he was not overwhelmed by sensation, he'd become very aware of the iron-hard bar of heat pressed against his thigh. That was currently the greatest source of his anxiety and he decided he'd better deal with it. Besides, some part of him was very curious and very eager to ... to what? To touch, to explore. To see what sounds Sebastian might make if he was touched in the same way he'd used to bring Ciel off.

"Be still," Ciel ordered quietly.

Sebastian looked at him curiously but obediently stretched out beside him and fell still.

"What are you doing, young master?" he asked softly as Ciel pushed himself up on his elbow.

The demon kept one arm curled around his little master, keeping him close. Ciel rather thought it might be for Sebastian's own sake as much as his considering how those fingers were absently massaging wherever they touched him. He didn't answer Sebastian's question, too busy looking down at the source of his current fascination. The demon made a small sound as he realized where Ciel's attention had turned and closed his eyes with a small sigh. He easily submitted to whatever it was Ciel was doing with a small smirk curling his lips. This was the most interesting morning he'd had in quite a while and not even his normal fastidiousness about the schedule and order of the household could make him give this opportunity up. The other servants would enjoy their sleep-in.

Ciel studied Sebastian with frank attention, his analytical mind cataloging basic facts even as his emotional self trembled with uncertainty. The demon's member was as perfectly formed as the rest of him, naturally. Ciel had no real concept of the average size of adult men but he'd unfortunately seen more examples than he ever wanted to see and compared to what he knew, Sebastian was fairly large. A bit longer than most Ciel had seen though not too big around. Slender and perfectly proportioned like the rest of his body, Ciel thought. And he found himself wondering if it felt as soft as well.

One small hand touch Sebastian's lower stomach and slid hesitantly downward. Sebastian's arm tightened slightly around Ciel's back and he let out a quiet breath of anticipation as Ciel's fingers brushed the skin just around his base.

"Please, little one," he whispered, seemingly unable to help himself. "Touch me."

The request was so quiet and gentle that Ciel couldn't bring himself to be annoyed as he might have been. Instead, he found it reassuring. He wouldn't admit it, but he was now a little wary of doing anything to bring back that feral side of his demon he'd glimpsed earlier. He had faith in Sebastian's control but he also knew it was foolish to ignore the small chance that the next time the demon might not be able to restrain his own instincts. 

Putting such things from his mind, Ciel turned his attention back to what he was doing. Light fingers brushed curiously along the shaft, enthralled as they felt the soft flesh. The demon's length was so hot, so hard, and Ciel could feel it throb beneath his fingers but the taut skin was so smooth, so velvety. Sebastian made a small noise and his hips shifted restlessly. Ciel smiled. That feeling of power rushed through him again as he realized how much Sebastian wanted his touch. He carefully wrapped his fingers around the base, finding that he could just barely fit his hand around the entire girth. He squeezed experimentally.

"Ah," Sebastian gasped quietly. "Who is teasing now?"

Ciel laughed shortly and turned his face for a kiss which Sebastian granted easily. He began to move his hand slowly as their lips met, sliding it up the hot length to run his fingertips around the swollen head. He quickly found that if he rubbed a specific spot just beneath the tip that he could make Sebastian make the most interesting sound. A moan mixed with that strange purr. He pressed his fingers more firmly there and the demon's hips jerked and his fingers tightened where they curled around the back of Ciel's neck.

"Young master," Sebastian breathed against his lips. "I am a very patient demon, usually, but even I have my limits. Especially if you keep doing that." 

Ciel smirked and moved his hand back down, stroking slowly, lightly.

"I rather like that," he admitted, making Sebastian smile.

The demon's fingers ran down Ciel's spine to the base where they paused for a moment before sliding slowly lower to stroke very lightly down his crease. Ciel shivered. Sebastian gave him a questioning look and he nodded. He'd been distracted from his original goal long enough.

Sebastian smiled and twisted away from Ciel, stretching to reach the jar he'd left on the nightstand. Ciel's hand kept unconsciously stroking as his demon slid back into place against him and rested a hand against his cheek.

"I need you to relax now," Sebastian said seriously. "Just breathe. I'll go slow."

Ciel nodded, not completely certain what Sebastian was doing.

The demon smiled. "Good."

And he pulled Ciel closer against him, forcing Ciel to release his member and move his hand to rest against his ribs. Sebastian curled his hand around the back of Ciel's knee and drew his leg up across his own thighs. Ciel found himself nearly on top of his demon again, straddling his hips, and feeling very exposed with his legs so wide open. He shifted uncomfortably and hid his face against Sebastian's shoulder.

"Relax," Sebastian reminded gently.

Ciel tried to do as his demon said as he heard the quiet sound of the jar being opened. He didn't bother to raise his head to see what Sebastian was doing but he must have been slicking the oil over his fingers because a moment later slippery, warm fingers brushed across the base of Ciel's spine, making him shudder. The slickness felt odd but good. Then he gasped as those fingers moved lower and slipped between his cheeks. It felt so strange, to be touched there with such gentleness. He shifted slightly again, a small sound slipping from his throat as a single fingertip stroked ever so lightly across his puckered entrance.

"Wh-what are you doing," he whispered against Sebastian's shoulder, panting slightly as that finger just lightly circled and stroked the sensitive folds.

"Do you dislike what I am doing?" Sebastian asked, that single finger still stroking slowly.

Ciel hesitated. The sensation did feel odd, but not bad. It was actually rather pleasurable; he'd never realized how sensitive that area really was. He shifted restlessly again.

"No, I don't dislike it," he said slowly. "But I don't understand..."

"I am preparing you," Sebastian explained. "The key is relaxation. The muscles will stretch if coaxed to do so slowly and it will not hurt you so much. You may feel some initial discomfort, I cannot prevent that, but it will pass." He paused for a moment before asking, "Have you not researched this? With your inquiring mind, I would have thought you'd have been curious as to the mechanics of such things, why people should choose to do them."

Ciel sighed. "I couldn't think about it," he admitted softly.

He'd tried to do just that, once. Sebastian's assessment of his curiosity was correct. But the moment he'd started trying to really think about it, he'd felt the memories threatening to overwhelm him and he'd quickly turned back to his paperwork and buried himself in calculations and reports.

Sebastian hummed in understanding and shifted him into a slightly more comfortable position. Ciel sighed deeply. Really, that stroking finger was becoming quite soothing. But it was a strange kind of soothing. He found himself wanting to just rest here atop his demon and let himself be teased but at the same time ignoring his desire for more touch was becoming increasingly difficult.

Sebastian pressed a little harder, running his finger in slow circles around and around the tiny entrance without ever touching it directly. Ciel didn't know how long this went on before he was unconsciously shifting his hips, pushing slightly back against Sebastian's finger, wanting more but not quite knowing what that more was.

Sebastian sighed in satisfaction and flicked his finger lightly over the entrance he'd been avoiding. Ciel gasped and the muscles twitched beneath his demon's finger.

"That's it, little one," Sebastian breathed into his hair. "Just breathe."

And he began to slowly, carefully press that finger against the tight ring of muscle, applying pressure as the tip began to slip inside. Ciel sucked in a breath and felt himself begin to tense as the memory of agony threatened to drown him. But Sebastian's free hand came up to rub his back lightly and a tender kiss was pressed to his hair. 

"Relax for me. It will not hurt if you relax. I promise. I cannot lie to you, young master."

Ciel gritted his teeth and forced his memories back. He clung to Sebastian's voice, his words, and took a deep breath. He forced his muscles to relax as he released the air from his lungs and, with that little bit of effort, he felt Sebastian's fingertip press inside him.

"Good," the demon whispered as Ciel gasped.

He squirmed slightly as the finger slid slowly deeper, stroking his inner walls with feather light touches. The sensation was so very strange but it did not hurt, as Sebastian had said, and he felt his anxiety ebb again. With this first proof of his demon's promise, he could finally bring himself to entertain the idea that the rest of this might not be so bad. His breaths came a bit faster as Sebastian began moving his finger slowly in and out and Ciel found himself actually starting to like the feeling.

"Mmmh, Sebastian," he moaned softly.

Sebastian made that low purring sound again and Ciel sighed as he felt it vibrate against his cheek. His demon slid his finger in all the way up to the knuckle and wriggled it slightly. Ciel gasped and squirmed. Strange, different, good.

And then Sebastian crooked his finger and pressed against something....

"Ah! Sebastian what mmmmh!"

Ciel's entire body jerked and Sebastian made a low, satisfied sound in his ear. He rubbed his finger across that spot again and Ciel whimpered helplessly.

"Se-seba-sti-an!"

"That, my little lord, is why you will not care much about the discomfort," Sebastian smirked, even as he withdrew his finger.

Ciel made a sound of discontent and shifted his hips, chasing the feeling he'd come to like surprisingly quickly. But a second later, Sebastian was pushing back into him with two fingers this time and he tightened his grip on his demon, hissing in pain. It wasn't nearly as bad as he'd expected but it burned as his muscles stretched to accommodate the added width.

"Just breathe, little one," Sebastian reminded him again. "You will adjust."

Ciel let out a breath through his teeth and tried to relax. But it hurt.

He tried to keep silent but a tiny whimper escaped his throat and Sebastian hummed in thought. He withdrew his fingers. Ciel finally lifted his head to glance up to Sebastian's face. His demon offered him a smile and reached for the oil again. He gathered a large amount, much more than Ciel would have thought necessary, and returned his fingers to his entrance to stroke lightly. But when he carefully pressed them back inside, some of the burn had eased.

"Ah, that's better," Sebastian murmured and with startling quickness, slid his fingers home.

Ciel let out a low cry as those fingers hit hard against that spot. His hands tightened on Sebastian, nails digging into his skin, and the demon made his own sound of restrained need.

"Little one, you are testing my patience."

"I can't help it when you ... aah ... when you ... do that," Ciel gasped as Sebastian began moving his fingers again, pressing against that pleasure zone with every inward thrust. Sebastian chuckled again and merely thrust his fingers in harder.

He was surprised to note that, yes, he had adjusted and the ache was mostly gone. And then he felt a third finger working its way into him. This time he didn't tense, breathing through the added stretching, trusting that Sebastian knew he could adjust to this as well. And after a few moments, he did. And he soon found himself squirming against his demon, pushing back against those fingers moving inside him, little sounds of want escaping him. At this point, as his pleasure mounted again, he was far past caring about his composure or dignity. He was hard again, very hard (he hadn't really known that was possible) and with every move he made, his erection was massaged where it was caught between their bodies. And those fingers were driving him mad! The slick slide, the tingling of newly discovered nerves, even the burn of stretched muscles all twined together to send spikes of mind-numbing pleasure throughout his body. And then Sebastian would thrust in again and hit that ... whatever it was ... and he writhed. 

"That's it, yes," Sebastian hissed, his voice a low growl.

Ciel's skin tingled with delicious sensation at that sound and the tiny pinpricks of claws he could feel against his back. Inexplicably, these glimpses of his demon's true self only heightened his excitement. He needed more, and he finally understood what he wanted.

"Sebastian ... uh ... mmmmm ... Se-Sebastian ... I ... need," he panted against Sebastian's shoulder, barely able to get his words out as his demon's fingers moved faster, harder.

"Not yet, my little one," Sebastian breathed. "I don't think you're ready."

Ciel whined in frustration. "I think I should know if--"

"No, you don't," Sebastian interrupted. "And besides, I am not finished teasing you."

Ciel growled and nipped him, this time deliberately. He shuddered at the low rumbling sound this drew from Sebastian's chest.

"What did I say about that, little one," he murmured.

Ciel just smirked and twisted his head to nip lightly at the side of his demon's neck. Sebastian hissed and withdrew his fingers. Ciel was just about to complain when, without warning, he slammed four fingers back into him.

"Aaahhh ... oh bloody hell," Ciel nearly screamed.

He dug his nails into Sebastian's skin, clinging tightly, trying to anchor himself through the pleasure. He didn't know if there was pain, he couldn't tell the difference anymore. He could hear his demon's panting, could feel his arousal pressing into his own thigh, and that was, if possible, even more thrilling than what Sebastian was doing to him. The knowledge that he was desired by such a being was a heady drug.

Sebastian's hand slid up his back to curl around the back of his neck and the demon urged his head up and sealed their lips in a fierce kiss. Ciel gasped into the kiss, unable to catch a breath as his demon invaded his mouth and body and mind. He pressed harder into Sebastian and the demon responded with overwhelming passion. The hand on the back of his neck tightened until he could feel those claws digging into his skin again. The kiss was bruising, Sebastian stealing every breath and feeding them back to him as he forced Ciel to open to him. And those fingers never stopped their movement, every thrust driving Ciel higher.

He writhed, trapped against Sebastian's body, burned by his heat. He knew he was close again; he wondered if, like before, Sebastian was purposefully trying to drive him over the edge. He wanted to hold on, wanted more, but he couldn't. Not when his demon pressed him even closer, twisting his own torso in a way which deliberately teased his hardness and Ciel lost his hold on control. He writhed and shuddered in Sebastian's hold, so close it almost hurt. He twisted his face to the side, desperate for air, and Sebastian's mouth slid to his neck. The demon sucked hard, just over his pulse point, and Ciel climaxed again with another echoing cry of his demon's name.

"Sebastian!"

Dimly he heard his demon purring as the heat of his release spread between them. The fingers were still inside him, though they had stilled, and Sebastian held him close as Ciel buried his face against his shoulder and shivered through the aftershocks. He felt rung out and heavy-limbed, entire body tingling with lingering sensitivity. But Sebastian wasn't finished with him.

The fingers gently withdrew and Ciel whimpered slightly at the loss. He felt strangely empty now and he didn't like the feeling. But Sebastian was moving beneath him.

"Mmmmh hmmm." A quiet sound of protest left his throat and Sebastian laughed quietly.

"Ah, you didn't think to tease me and leave it at that, did you?"

"I can't move," Ciel murmured, too languid to bother being annoyed as usual.

"Then I suppose I won't make you," Sebastian laughed softly.

And with one quick movement he flipped them again, so that Ciel lay on his back under his demon, blanketed by his heat. Ciel sighed, completely comfortable where he was. He'd forgotten his anxieties by now, too relaxed and pleased to be apprehensive about what Sebastian was about to do. On the contrary, he wanted it. He wanted that feeling of fullness, of slide and pressure, of connection.

A lock of dark hair tickled across his chest as Sebastian bent his head to almost lazily lap at a tiny, pink nipple. Ciel whimpered softly and lifted one heavy hand to tease the silken strands through his fingers. His demon hummed, and moved higher to lick away the perspiration beaded along Ciel's throat.

"Oh, your taste," Sebastian groaned against his skin and Ciel shivered.

He ran his hands over Sebastian's shoulders, across his back, touching anywhere he could reach. He was answered by a low rumble in the demon's chest and a light, playful nip to the underside of his jaw. It was not at all hard enough to break skin but the scrape of those sharp teeth made him gasp and jerk slightly against his demon. Sebastian made a low sound somewhere between a growl and a moan and Ciel tangled his fingers in that decadent hair and scratched lightly.

"Master ... I need..."

Ciel shivered again at the breathless, desperate sound of his demon's voice. He didn't have to see Sebastian's face to know his mask of humanity would have slipped away entirely. He thought, in his sex addled brain, that he felt the soft tickle of feathers along his arms and brushing against his sides. He couldn't see anything but that didn't mean they weren't there.

"Yes, Sebastian," Ciel whispered. "Do it."

Sebastian groaned quietly at Ciel's words and reached down, slipping his hands beneath his master's thighs. He urged Ciel to wrap his legs around his back and shifted them into the best position he could.

Ciel gasped and tightened his fingers in Sebastian's hair, crushing the strands in silken handfuls as he felt the broad head of his demon's throbbing member brush across his entrance. He was not afraid, not like before, but he was suddenly uncertain. Sebastian was so, so much bigger than him and....

"Sebastian?" he whispered, making the demon fall still though he trembled minutely with the effort of it.

"Yes, my young lord," he murmured, voice, low, husky, pure lust, sending jolts of arousal straight to Ciel's groin.

He swallowed, forcing himself to ignore the urge to rub up against the hard abdomen, and voiced his question. 

"Will it ... will it really fit?" He hated the uncertainty, the weakness, in his voice but there was no help for it.  
At any other time Sebastian would have called him out on it, challenged him to harden himself to the task at hand, taunted him for his human weakness. But not now.

"My little one, this body was entirely designed for yours. I promised I would not hurt you, did I not?"

Ciel took a deep breath and nodded. He closed his eyes then in submission to the desire and tightened his legs around his demon.

"Then, do it, Sebastian."  
"Yes ... my lord," Sebastian grunted even as, with one quick, smooth thrust, he sheathed himself fully within his master's body.  
"Aah!" Ciel cried out loudly at the feeling of sudden fullness and dug his nails into Sebastian's shoulders, desperate to anchor himself somehow.

It didn't really hurt, at all. He'd thought it would, thought he'd have to adjust like before, but he was already so relaxed after two orgasms, Sebastian had already stretched him so well, that he could barely feel the burn. And the oil, Sebastian must have slicked more along his own length when Ciel wasn't paying attention, because now there was so much slickness that they slid together with incredible ease.

"All right, little one?" Sebastian panted above him, tense.

"Yes," Ciel groaned. "I ... ah ... I'm fine. Move please."

He whimpered as he shifted and the angle of penetration changed slightly. Sebastian growled softly and obeyed, pulling out slowly before pushing back in just as slowly. Ciel clung to him with arms and legs and just let himself feel. Feel each slow, deliberate push and pull as Sebastian tested him and teased them both. But he was never a patient person and he was soon rocking his hips, meeting each thrust as best he could. And then Sebastian shifted his angle slightly again and the head of his member brushed against that spot he'd been teasing earlier.

"Oh Sebastian yes! There ... ah ... please ... hmmm ... f-faster!" 

Sebastian purred in his ear and quickened his thrusts.

"So ... tight. So good, my little master," he gasped against Ciel's throat and Ciel responded with his own cries of pleasure as Sebastian thrust harder, directly where he needed it most.

He writhed beneath his demon, crying for more, harder, faster and uncaring how base he was just now. Everything was just too good. The fire sparking along his nerves, the feeling of fullness he never imagined he'd adore so much, the slickness, the little inhuman sounds falling from his demon's lips that proved his pleasure, even the wet, vulgar sounds of their bodies moving together, a thing which would normally revolt him, now made Ciel shiver and demand more. And Sebastian gave it to him and took his own pleasure in return. It didn't take long for Ciel to find himself once again clinging to that edge by his fingernails, he was young and this was, for all intents and purposes, his first sexual experience. So he whimpered and cried and clung to his demon, moving with him, scratching his short nails down that smooth back. And he knew his demon was close as well as his rhythm stuttered. He was waiting such a long time for this, Ciel thought. He suspected this, needing no confirmation to be convinced.

"Oh yes. Let go for me. Scream for me. My Ciel."

The words moaned directly into his ear in that voice of sin would have been enough. But the sound of his name, his given name, on those wicked, delectable lips broke him like nothing else could. And he screamed Sebastian's name as he released for the third time that morning, entire body arching beneath his demon, muscles tightening around the length inside him and drawing an answering growl from Sebastian's throat. Ciel thrashed as the pleasure overwhelmed him, his oversensitive nerves screaming with near pain as Sebastian continued to ride him, seeking his own climax. And just when Ciel thought his body had been rung dry, that he couldn't possibly take any more, he felt his demon shudder above him and liquid heat filled him as Sebastian released with an inhuman growl of ecstasy. Ciel whimpered and shivered as his member twitched with another weak stab of pleasure.

He lay beneath Sebastian, too dazed and heavy to even open his eyes, but he still clung tightly to the body above him. Sebastian stayed perfectly still for a moment before he sighed and collapsed to his side, taking Ciel with him. Strong arms held the small, exhausted body to a warm chest and something incredibly soft curled around him, cocooning him in warm darkness. Ciel made a small sound of wonder, even in his lethargy finding the strength to lift a hand and run his fingers reverently over the soft, ebony feathers. Sebastian buried his face in Ciel's hair, purring in clear contentment as Ciel sleepily petted him, fascinated by this part of his demon he'd never been allowed to see before.

Ciel's body quivered slightly as tiny aftershocks of sensation tingled through his nerves. He curled tightly into his demon's embrace and allowed himself to relish the warmth, the safety. This was the first time Ciel had felt truly relaxed or content or safe in years and he would admit, at least to himself, that he would do almost anything to have this feeling again. Perhaps it was ridiculous to be so addicted to the warmth of the being who would devour him but then, he wanted no one else, nothing else in the end.

The silence stretched between them as they rested in the aftermath, Sebastian apparently content to lie still and hold his little human tightly. He was still sheathed within Ciel and neither were inclined to move and change that. Ciel sighed softly, resting his cheek against Sebastian's shoulder, fingers curled in soft feathers, soothed by Sebastian's quiet purring and fingers gently carding through his hair. He was nearly asleep when Sebastian finally murmured against his temple, "Are you well, my little master."

"Hmmm," Ciel murmured in acknowledgement.

Sebastian chuckled lightly and gently kissed the temple beneath his lips.  
"I think you should sleep now, little one," he murmured. "I know you did not sleep last night and I have already canceled all appointments for the day. You need rest." Sebastian paused a moment before continuing. "Have I satisfied your order, my lord?"

Ciel huffed a low laugh. "Yes, Sebastian. Quite thoroughly I think. And now I fully understand what they took from me," he whispered the last with something akin to wistfulness.

Sebastian didn't respond. To him, this was only another facet which enhanced the complex flavors of Ciel's soul. Ah, that flavor. He could taste a tantalizing hint in every inch of Ciel's body and he easily admitted that he would do anything his master wished if only for another opportunity to sample that delicacy. But the sounds of Ciel's cries of pleasure, the feeling of him beneath Sebastian's own body, tight around him, was nearly as sweet to the demon. He needed the closeness just as much as Ciel did and perhaps they had both finally figured out they could no longer live without it.

He stirred finally, carefully pulling free of Ciel's body and starting to disengage from him. Ciel whined in sleepy protest and clung tighter. Sebastian smiled. He would stay here all day curled around his human if he could but he had appearances to keep up, servants to monitor, a house to maintain. Ciel could take a day for personal reasons but it would not do for Sebastian to disappear at the same time.

"My lord, I need to attend to the household. If I stay, the servants will talk."

Ciel sighed and reluctantly loosened his grip, allowing Sebastian to slip free. One small hand stroked along a wing as the demon sat up and assessed his physical form for cracks in his facade. A second later, the very human butler was back, all signs of the hell beneath neatly hidden. Sebastian smiled as he caught the almost sad look on Ciel's face as the wing disappeared beneath his fingertips. Really, the boy was so adorable when he was drowsy. That cold wall that hid all emotion went down and a tiny hint of the child he'd once been peeked through.

Sebastian rose and dressed in a second, straightening himself to his usual impeccable appearance. Another second later he returned from the washroom with a damp cloth and began gently cleaning the evidence of their coupling from his master's skin. Ciel murmured and shifted sleepily to give his demon better access.

"Nice," he muttered. Sebastian just reached up to smooth a lock of dark hair back from the small brow and leaned down to place a gentle kiss there.

"Rest, my little soul," he whispered, into Ciel's ear, knowing he was already asleep.

A quiet rustle of fabric--or was it wings?--a click of the door and the dark, silent room was left as the only witness when small fingers curled around a single black feather and pressed it to a smooth cheek for the comfort of its presence.

* * *

When Lizzie next arrived, uninvited and unannounced, Ciel was forced from his concentration on financial reports to entertain. As always, he braced himself as his exuberant fiancee ran to him and threw her arms around him in a crushing hug.

"Oh Ciel! I'm so happy to see you! I didn't think I'd be able to come today but Mother said our afternoon plans were canceled so I came here instead! That's a new outfit! It's just adorable on you!"

Ciel tried not to roll his eyes at the onslaught. He never would like Lizzie's smothering hugs and the endless chatter of words was impossible to keep up with, let alone respond to. But this time, he did gently respond to her embrace just enough to be proper. And really, he was too busy reveling in the fact that he hadn't instinctually flinched at the first touch of her tiny, innocent hands. And then there was the fascinating flash of annoyance (and was that jealousy?), he caught in his butler's eyes over the girl's shoulder. How ridiculous. And sweet.

"Lizzie," he said, finally managing to get a word in. "I was actually in the middle of reports but I was just about to take tea." He hadn't been but he could lie like the devil himself. "Would you join me?"

And of course she enthusiastically agreed. And when Lizzie eagerly suggested that she and her maid could stay this night as it was getting so late and she was certain if she rang her Mother and asked she'd get permission as Ciel and his household were so honorable, Ciel gently reminded her that he still had work to complete and she'd already told him she and her mother had plans to dine with some of their lady friends that night. And he was proud of himself for remembering this fact because he certainly couldn't give the true reason why he wanted no one in the well-appointed guest rooms along the hallway outside his doors. For if one were to accidently listen at those doors, perhaps on the way to the washroom in the middle of the night, it would be very difficult to explain away the screams and growls and pleading they may hear. And as Sebastian leaned over to place a plate of little cakes in the center of the tea table and murmured in his master's ear, far too low for the girl across from them to hear, "Oh but master, I do seem to remember the lady is quite a heavy sleeper. She would stir for nothing." Ciel knew that night would not be silent. After all, he had a point to prove to the sly, infuriating creature whose fingers had just, apparently accidently, brushed a feather light caress along his cheek as the tall form straightened. He had wanted to purge the weakness that every touch from his fiancee drove into him, though it was never about her. There was no use in being jealous when you already owned the object of your desire, body and soul.


End file.
